Royally Viewed

Has anyone considered that I don't deserve to look like 'I didn't make it'? They put my songs on the radio without me. Now I look like the guy that was on the radio except I didn't make it. Is that fair? I have nothing in common with the creep. Being a star on the radio is not my main goal in life. I wouldn't feel comfortable with my songs mixed in with songs I dislike. On the other hand, being on the radio would pay royalties, as long as they spelled my name right on the cheques. I haven't been paid for my songs. And the decision to put my songs on the radio was made by outsiders acting in their own interests without informing me. I had nothing to do with it. I don't write songs so I can be a star, I write them from an impulse. It's my nature to create. I don't chase stardom, I just make music. I never get paid for it so I'm not in it for the money. I don't need the radio to like my recordings if I like my recordings because I'm satisfied with my accomplishment. It lets me feel successful even though I'm not on MTV with my guitar. I imagine that most artists are like me. But the ones who took my songs weren't artists. I don't care how glorious they looked to you, to me they were losers. After the radio and TV made everyone think they were better than I am, glory is out of the question for me. Right now I'm shooting for acceptance. What have I done to earn this royal treatment? I'm a musician. Why do they want to make me look bad? Shouldn't they be helping me? If they like my music, why do they make my life hard? I could be working on a recording right now. It costs money to be a musician. I could write more songs if I had more money. I could put on a better show with more money. It's hard to keep up a decent appearance with no money. They paid this band, they won't pay me. Am I supposed to be a loser because they liked my songs? Is it my fault for erasing them and forgetting them? Look what happens when I know them. They were honoured and paid for pretending they wrote them. I wrote them and it is practically held against me. I am sometimes pitied: 'You poor thing! You wrote those songs! Do you need to collect disability? We understand.' All that work and it's supposed to be my fault that I wasn't paid. I don't fit the image of my music well enough. I don't pay close enough attention to the TV and radio. I'm too old. I'm too religious. I didn't fill out the form. I have the wrong attitude. And as I linger in poverty they can say I'm a bum. And eventually people will start inventing their own reasons for why I wasn't paid, all of which let the culprits off the hook at my expense. No cars and girls for me yet. I'm hanging in there. Any women out there up for a game of chess? I'm a wild man. If you think that band got into trouble in that limousine, you should have seen what I did with my bicycle. I waited until it got dark and then I rode over a patch of wet cement leaving no impression from my tire tracks. Don't ask me why. I'm a rebel. I just lost control. And they know what would happen if they put me in a chauffeur driven car: I would cheerfully read my novel. They're afraid that such an occurrence would alter the universe and they want to keep things as they are. I say: it's my limo and I'll read if I want to; read Fergus Hume to a woman or two. The Medieval church is said to have used stained glass windows to hypnotize the peasants. We are dumbstruck by glowing lights. We trust them. Information is passed to modern consumers through the photons of television. The folks at home are in a relaxed, agreeable condition when they receive it. But the light of truth shines from within the mind. Have you ever tried to sleep with the image of a powerful light shining in your mind? It doesn't help if you close your eyes. The only escape from it is to stare into a flashlight beam.
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